I have been awake since about 3:45 this morning, that seems to be my new norm between 4 and 6. Sleep doesn’t come until about midnight sometimes later, I am not sure who this person is as I used to be an at least 12 hours of sleep a night girl! But it’s nice to sit and drink my coffee and meditate and get my mind frame right for the day…sometimes that happens, sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes it causes me to be agitated because let me tell you I love my sleep! But some days it makes for a good day. Today was a good productive day ~ helped John work on getting his collaboration project started with Virgo Photos ~ hint: they are publishing a photo book! Kind of exciting huh?

I had forgotten how much sitting in a chair for a couple of hours practically debilitates me for the rest of the day because of pain and swelling…so guess where I have been most of the afternoon…yup, laying on the bed with my “surgically repaired” foot elevated as it decided it would be fun to swell up today. This really gets me down, my surgery was 2 years ago, my injury 3 years ago and it seems like the end is not even close to being in sight. But I tell myself, that it is ok, this too shall pass.

Happy Saturday and much love 🥰

I know I can’t go without it but man I hate the side effects of all the meds I have to take just to survive a day….dizziness, light headed, cold sweat, heart pounding and that’s just sitting in my chair. But man let me skip even one and I am either very snarky or I just want to cry all day…..feels like I can’t win any way I go.

So now let’s talk about pain….dealing with pain ~ is that worse than mental issues or are the mental issues worse. So now pain management has been added to my list of doctors that I have to see….so let’s count….psychiatrist, “confessionalist”, spine doctor, ankle/foot specialist, G.P., and pain management….I have more doctors than most 90 year olds. Oh and let’s not forget the doctor I see for my stomach issues caused by all the meds I now have to take. This coming from a girl that only took ibuprofen for pain that started 25 years ago from a birth defect. My “normal” is no longer….

Did you know that I wanted to join the Air Force? It wasn’t until I told my dad that I wanted to join that I was told I would never pass a physical to join the Air Force. Even though I was born with a birth defect, I have always been told I can do anything…played soft ball, played basketball. It wasn’t until I had my sweet babies that my hips and low back shifted and for several years until I was told by my dr to stop working or I wouldn’t be able to walk…..gonna stop with that, went further with my story than I intended.

Until next tomorrow….Much love