🥺 today will be my first outing to a public place since COVID-19 started, so to say I am freaking out is putting it mildly. My chest is hurting, my breathing is crazy….My appointment isn’t until 9:30 for what I hope is my last appointment for this workers comp case…another IME…which is also causing me great anxiety. Which is worse the thought of being in public with the possibility of COVID exposure…wearing a mask…or the appointment…for sure the mask wearing….what if I have a panic attack and I am around people and can’t take my mask off so I can catch my breath?! Then if I take my mask off how many non mask wearers will have this stupid virius which exposes me ~ as you can imagine my immune system is not the best since I have pretty much been a nonsocialist for 3 years because of pain, anxitey, panic. And this fear of having to go into the office by myself in my wheelchair is also causing me a great deal of grief. Will this ever end. Will I ever get over the fear of going somewhere by myself without overthinking what if something happens? What if I slip again, what if I am out and have an attack and there is no one to help me. What if…what if…what if….

Will it ever end?